{"id":686,"date":"2021-07-21T12:23:11","date_gmt":"2021-07-21T12:23:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/valuedvoices.com\/?p=686"},"modified":"2023-09-25T16:22:34","modified_gmt":"2023-09-25T16:22:34","slug":"temper-tantrums-what-every-parent-needs-to-know","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/valuedvoices.com\/temper-tantrums-what-every-parent-needs-to-know\/","title":{"rendered":"Temper Tantrums: What Every Parent Needs to Know"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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Let\u2019s be real, we all know what a temper tantrum is. Whether you are a parent, teacher, therapist, or just someone at the grocery store, we have all seen a child having a moment of dysregulation, or what we know as a temper tantrum.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

For parents, temper tantrums can be very difficult. You are going through a whirlwind of emotions: empathy for your child, trying to figure out how to help them and keep them safe, feeling frustrated, and often times when it happens in front of others, feeling embarrassed and like you have no control. Often times, when I speak to parents about tantrums, they really believe they are alone, that their child is the only child that has their moments. Well, believe me when I say: YOU ARE NOT ALONE. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tantrums are completely normal and in fact, a typical part of growing up. <\/strong>There are different types of tantrums, and of course, many different reasons a child throws a tantrum. There are also several ways we can better understand, support and guide our little ones on how to manage a tantrum. Let\u2019s take a closer look:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Phases of Tantrums<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

It is not uncommon for temper tantrums to start around 1 year of age. At this age, infants do not have a clear means of communication and don\u2019t have a way to express their wants, needs, and feelings in a way that they feel understood, which leads to feelings of frustration. So, what does your baby do when they feel frustrated, they cry-otherwise known as a tantrum. This is the only way that your baby can communicate with you. During this stage, parents can learn to recognize their baby\u2019s needs through the different cries (hunger, gas, discomfort, sleepiness, etc.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the toddler years, tantrums can look a bit different and feel a bit more intense. Toddler tantrums sometimes lead to meltdowns, which can include kicking, hitting, screaming, and biting. The difference between a tantrum and a meltdown is:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A tantrum is an expression of a want or need
A meltdown is the result of too much sensory input or a feeling of dysregulation<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Again, it is important for parents to understand that tantrums are a very typical part of the development<\/strong> and very common for children between the ages of 1-3. <\/strong>As mentioned in the last blog post Communication & Behavior<\/a> <\/strong>it is very important for parents to connect to their little one\u2019s need, as often a tantrum is the result of an unmet need. This does not mean you are doing ANYTHING<\/strong> wrong. This is just your little one\u2019s form of communication at the moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Around 4-6 years of age,<\/strong> most children begin to outgrow tantrums as they have learned more coping strategies and ways to self-regulate. Your little one may have also learned more ways effective ways to express themselves. Still, around this age, you may see tantrums occurring. The most common reasons for tantrums during this age are difficulty regulating emotions <\/strong>and\/or testing the limits of authority.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Are There Other Reasons for Tantrums?<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

While most tantrums are completely normal and a result of an unmet need and\/or difficulty in expressing that need, there are times that they can also be a sign of something deeper going on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A study by Manning et al., published in the Journal of Applied Developmental Psychology <\/strong><\/a>looked more closely into the connection between late talkers and tantrums. The results revealed that little ones between 12-to-38 months of age with fewer spoken words<\/strong> demonstrated more frequent and severe temper tantrums. <\/strong>Toddlers who were late talkers<\/strong><\/a> also had more severe tantrums when compared to their same aged peers with typical language development.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Handling a Tantrum<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

Now you may be wondering: \u201chow do I help my little one express their wants and need without having a tantrum?\u201d The answer is: PREVENTION, <\/strong>PATIENCE, PRACTICE & CONSISTENCY. <\/strong>The good news is TANTRUMS CAN BE OVERCOME. <\/strong>It is all about connecting with your little one\u2019s needs and finding coping strategies that help your child in these moments of frustration or sadness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can reduce the likelihood of tantrums by:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n